I’m Having Some Strong Feelings About This

I have never really cared whether people misconstrued my race; people have usually meant no harm in assuming I’m Mexican, Polynesian, or Chinese. I didn’t mind correcting them and got used to their surprised faces when I told them I was Navajo. I guess even now I don’t really mind gently emending people’s confusion, but the slew of stupidity that spews from their mouths in the aftermath is what I can never get used to: “Oh, I’m Indian too! My great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great grandmother was Cherokee,” or “Oh, you must get a TON of money for school,” or (and I got this one a couple of days ago) “Oh, you must be very spiritually attuned. You should be a medicine woman!” Lol. Well, guess what?

And it wasn’t until recently that I’ve really come to let myself realize just how discriminated Native Americans are everywhere, almost all of the time. I had chosen to ignore it to save my peace of mind, but no longer can I stand by and let the ignorance and blatant misinformation of others wash over me. I can’t do it anymore!

I’m tired of the generic, tribe-less Indian, who wears their hair long and their fringed clothes proud as the standard for thousands of different and unique people. I’m tired of the sexualization of Native women (I’m talking about you, sexy Indian costume) and the lack of justice that comes from sexual assaults committed on reservations. I’m tired of seeing my grandparents live in poverty, without running water or electricity. I’m tired of knowing that my dad and hundreds of other Natives who were forced to attend the Federal boarding schools, who were physically, emotionally and sexually abused, will probably never see any form of retribution. I’m tired of people claiming to be “Indian” like it’s an exclusive trend without realizing that once you claim to be “Indian” you are putting upon yourself the issues of the modern Native, and then looking stupid because you have no idea what the issues are. I’m tired of people assuming I get a hand out, that my schooling must be all paid for by honest taxpayers like you, when really I haven’t gotten one penny from the Navajo Nation. I’m tired of Natives being seen as all-spiritual beings, one with the earth and all that shit. I’m tired of all the misinformation out there about Natives, the various clumpings and blatant lies, and I’m sad that we as a people, don’t correct it more often. I’m tired of being a novelty.

But the one thing that I’m so sick of hearing I could scream is, “It happened so long ago, why does it even matter? You need to get over it.”…How can I get over something whose repercussions I still feel, that my father and grandparents still feel?…GRR.

I could probably rant for ages about this, but I won’t because I’m tired of ranting too. I’m just tired all around. People are dumb, mostly harmless and innocent, but come on…get your head out of your butt.

The Way To My Heart (Listen Up Boys)

The way to worm yourself into my life and eventually into my heart:

1. Tickle My Funny Bone

Yeah, obviously having a sense of humor is on everyone’s list of prerequisites for a relationship (and if it isn’t, then there might be something wrong with you), so it’s a no brainer that it’s on mine. I love to laugh, end of story. If you can make me genuinely laugh, usually through Arrested Development quotes or a brilliantly fantastical account of something awesome or mundane that happened to you, then you’re on the right track. If you can make me laugh without reserve, which usually results in tears and awkward seal noises, then you have nothing more to fear because you’ve become my new friend/crush/soul mate. Also, sharing a good laugh is just as good as being funny yourself. So if you like The IT Crowd, New Girl, Pineapple Express, or any Wes Anderson movie, watch it with me and we shall have a merry time bonding.

2. Be Open-minded

Open-minded to me means one looks at things objectively, with as little bias as possible, especially when it goes against something you feel strongly about. There have been so many times when people have been so off-putting because they simply refuse to allow people to voice their opinions because they’re different from their own. IT’S SO ANNOYING. Let people talk and respectfully listen! Allow yourself to see things from another’s point of view! You don’t have to change anything about yourself, and if you happen to do so, hopefully it’s for the better. Honestly, there’s nothing more classy than that. Fo realzies. And I’m not asking for someone who is so open that they have no center either. That is just as annoying as being locked up so tight nothing can be let in. So, you’ve got to be open-minded, but have your morals and values strong enough to share with others and not sound like a douche…I really don’t think that’s too much to ask for. I try to be this way myself, and I know that I’m nowhere near “perfect” in this aspect, so know that I don’t expect it from you either.

3. Let’s Have A Rewarding Conversation

I almost put that I wanted an “intelligent”  conversation, but sometimes those aren’t very fun! Being entertained and engrossed in discussion is so much more rewarding than sharing pious opinions. I want to talk about whatever comes up in my mind and yours! I want to talk with people who aren’t  afraid to talk about anything. I love talking about everything and anything, from the latest music to racial representations of minors, hell, even the nasty gossip. Hah, actually, I enjoy gossiping a lot more than I should. It’s despicable, I know, but oh so satisfying!

4. Give Sincere Compliments

Everyone loves getting compliments! Anyone who says they don’t is a liar. They’re a great way to boost confidence, especially when they’re genuinely thoughtful and true. I love getting truly sincere compliments. They just make my day. Like at my last voice lesson, my teacher just gave me tons of compliments after I sang through my Mozart aria for the first time memorized (hah, even though I had to stop a couple of times to think of the words :P ). It was so nice of him and I left that lesson feeling like I was on cloud nine. He is always so sincere in his commendations and in his appraisal of my singing, which helps me trust him more and more with my voice and performance :) Also, compliments are way better when they’re unexpected. For example, my friend Heidi came up to me the other day during opera rehearsal and told me my hair was “a dream come true”. How sweet is that?! Not only was it unexpected, but what an awesome way to say to say your hair looks nice, lol.

5. Be Romantically Unavailable

If you’re a girl and have done all of the above, sorry, I’m not into the lady bits, but congratulations, you’re probably my friend! If you’re a boy, well I’m either half in love with you or not at all, but either way, you’re also probably my friend! Haha, seriously though, this one hits a bit harder than the others because the last few people I’ve crushed really hard on were already very, very, VERY, romantically involved (like, married involved), making my feelings redundant and exasperating. But does that stop me from making that same mistake over and over again? Of course not! That would be healthy emotional progress, and I try to avoid that whenever possible. Haha, actually though, deep down I think I like guys who aren’t available because then I know I’m safe from having the agonizing ordeal of trying to interpret the weird, cryptic signs girls think guys make. It does make life a lot easier when you’re not constantly reading into someone’s body language for a sign that they are secretly in love with you. Ain’t nobody got time fo’ dat.

Bonus Points if you have an awesome man-beard/scruff AND/OR are 30+ years old.

I’m Just A Sucker For A List

Why, hello. Long time no see, eh?

I’ve been thinking about coming back to the blog for while now, but life kept getting in the way, pushing the idea further and further from my mind. But there’s no better time to start to remedy that than today, and I’m hoping to do that by starting a little challenge.

Hah, I know what you’re thinking, “Another challenge? She didn’t even finish the last one”.  Yeah, yeah, I know I’m the worst at pulling through and finishing stuff, but I want to take another shot at it! I found a list (hah, I’m just a sucker for a list) that’s similar to the 30 Day Music Challenge I attempted almost two years ago (wow, was it really that long ago?!), but instead of sharing a song, you write a blog post. Sounds fun, right? Now this is supposed to be a “30 Day” challenge too, but, let’s be realistic, I’m not going to do this everyday! Haha, that is just dumb. So instead the goal is to do one or two a week, more if I can find the time. This way I don’t think I’ll be setting myself up for failure, since this is purely for fun!

So expect the first post sometime this week!

I’m One Year Older and Wiser Too.

Image via Wikipedia

Twenty-two years ago I was reluctantly born. The story goes that during labor I kept floating back up instead of down; the nurses were pushing on my mom’s stomach to get me out. Plus that suction thingy they stick on the baby’s head didn’t work because I had some crazy hair going on and it wouldn’t stay. The doctor and nurses were calling me a turtle. Maybe I was warm and comfy? Haha, I don’t know. Anyway, I obviously got out and now I’m here. Good story, huh?

I’m a little saddened that birthdays and other special occasions/holidays aren’t as exciting as they used to be. I remember trying to stay awake all night just so I could see the clock strike midnight and being so happy that the day was finally here, whether it was my birthday or Christmas or New Year’s. That whole day would be filled with happiness and cheer and had a wonderfully rosy gleam to everything I saw. Now it’s just another day; it’s lost the magic of naiveté. I know a lot more than I did ten years ago, and even one year ago. My knowledge of the world makes it harder for me to celebrate something that, in the bigger picture, doesn’t really matter. Haha, I guess that’s a kind of depressing way to look at your birthday, but it’s true. I’m not saying I still don’t enjoy my birthday, I do, but I’m no longer in a state of impenetrable giddiness either. I guess I’m just neutral.

All I know is that I wish I could get that feeling back. I want to be excited today.

Moonrise Kingdom

I am very excited for this to come out. Very. Thank God for Wes Anderson.